![Angry Outbursts, Screaming, and Hurtful Words Image](https://img.resized.co/shuffle/eyJkYXRhIjoie1widXJsXCI6XCJodHRwczpcXFwvXFxcL2NvbnRlbnQucHJvZHVjdGlvbi5jZG4uYXJ0MTkuY29tXFxcL2ltYWdlc1xcXC81ZlxcXC9lYlxcXC9iMVxcXC81ZVxcXC81ZmViYjE1ZS1mNmFhLTQ1ZjUtOGJjMy1jMmViNTdmNGE5ZGVcXFwvODViMzdhYWQ3YTE3ODhmOGM0NTE1NjgxZTJhYTMwZTM2NjgyZGI0ODAyMzUyMjg2Y2E4NzM4M2RjZDdiYTI0OTgxZjczMmQ5Nzg3OWQwYzVjZTk1YTNkODBmZjQ4YjgyNTFmZGZjNDYyNzFmNGE2N2VlNmJkMjIwMmI3MTliM2IuanBlZ1wiLFwid2lkdGhcIjoyODAsXCJoZWlnaHRcIjoyODAsXCJkZWZhdWx0XCI6XCJodHRwczpcXFwvXFxcL3d3dy5nb2xvdWRub3cuY29tXFxcL2ltYWdlc1xcXC9sb2dvLnN2Z1wiLFwib3B0aW9uc1wiOltdfSIsImhhc2giOiI2YzJhMmZlZTg1MTZhZGRhMjlhMGZhNmU1YjlmNDgzYzJiNWU2MTY5In0=/angry-outbursts-screaming-and-hurtful-words.jpeg)
Angry Outbursts, Screaming, and Hurtful Words
5 December 2023 - 44 minsTwo discouraged, desperate families write to Janet for help with 4.5-year-olds who seem perpetually angry. These children are lashing out verbally, screaming and shouting at their parents and siblings, and seem particularly explosive at the end of the day. One parent writes that her child "seems like she is very intentionally trying to be hurtful," and adds, "It doesn't seem like she should be able to get away with treating us and her sister this way." The second family writes that when picking their daughter up from school "and the tiniest thing is not right, the screaming and shouting begins. Everything is catastrophic." Janet recommends specific adjustments these parents can make in the w...
![Am I Ruining My Child With Respectful Parenting? (A Parent Consultation)](https://img.resized.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-i-ruining-my-child-with-respectful-parenting-a-parent-consultation.jpeg)
Am I Ruining My Child With Respectful Parenting? (A Parent Consultation)
A mom fears that her gentle, respectful approach to her toddler's feelings and behaviors is too permissive and isn't teaching her to treat others with kindness and respect. She says she’s been following Janet’s approach from the beginning, but when her daughter kicks and screams and generally melts down, she can't help but question if simply acting calm and acknowledging her feelings is the right attitude. "... This isn't getting better, it's getting worse, and I feel like maybe I'm going down the wrong path or there's something I'm doing wrong." Janet encourages this parent to be more assertive with her own personal boundaries and clarifies what she means when she recommends accepting and acknowledging feelings. Learn more about Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" at: NoBadKidsCourse.com. Please support our sponsors and take advantage of their special offers. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
46 mins
3 September Finished
![Everything Upsets My Spirited Toddler (A Parent Consultation)](https://img.resized.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-upsets-my-spirited-toddler-a-parent-consultation.jpeg)
Everything Upsets My Spirited Toddler (A Parent Consultation)
Janet consults with a single mom who is alarmed by her toddler's strong reactions and aggressive behavior. She seems easily and almost constantly upset—hits, pushes, and bites her mother and brother—and won't be consoled. "When she is crying for a little while because of me taking something away, I console her and say, 'I know you didn't want me to take that away. I'm so sorry I had to, it was not safe.' I will pick her up and rub her back and she will slap me." Naturally, this mom wonders where such intense, angry reactions from her daughter could be coming from and how to effectively respond. Learn more about Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" at: NoBadKidsCourse.com. Please support our sponsors and take advantage of their special offers. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
43 mins
27 August Finished
![3 Ways to Calm Back-to-School Jitters](https://img.resized.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-ways-to-calm-back-to-school-jitters.jpeg)
3 Ways to Calm Back-to-School Jitters
Starting a new school, going back to school, or starting daycare is one of the most challenging transitions for our kids —and us—at this early stage of their lives. It means a new routine, new caregivers and friends, and many unknowns. It’s normal for both parent and child to feel some trepidation, and it’s rare that our child will accept all the changes willingly or gracefully. Usually, we can expect some strong expression of feeling in the home either before, during, or after the transition—short fuses, prickliness, whining, crying, tantrums—and these feelings may linger for many months. For our part, as parents, it’s difficult not to feel guilty and question our decisions when our child seems so unsettled. Janet has three suggestions that can make this important time in our lives easier for all of us. Learn more about Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" at: NoBadKidsCourse.com. Please support our sponsors and take advantage of their special offers. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
20 mins
20 August Finished
![Baffled by "Bad" Behavior? Do This First](https://img.resized.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-by-bad-behavior-do-this-first.jpeg)
Baffled by "Bad" Behavior? Do This First
When our kids' behavior seems negative or inappropriate, we know we should disallow it. But what if the behavior continues? Or goes from bad to worse? What is our child needing from us or telling us that we're missing? There's often a simple, yet easy to overlook, answer. In this episode, Janet responds to notes from parents who have become alarmed by their kids' recent behavior. One child seems hooked on playing that he's a "bad guy" and becomes physically aggressive. Another tells his parents he wants to hurt them. A third is sneaking food and even medicine. These parents are unerringly patient and empathetic, but nothing seems to work. One parent writes: “It's been getting more intense over the past several months, and I really want it to stop, but I don't know how. Am I doing something wrong?” Janet has an idea for what they may be missing, and she explains how it applies in each of these families' situation. Learn more about Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" at: NoBadKidsCourse.com. Please support our sponsors and take advantage of their special offers. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
24 mins
13 August Finished
![Help Kids Realize Their Potential With the Power of Less (With Kim John Payne)](https://img.resized.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-kids-realize-their-potential-with-the-power-of-less-with-kim-john-payne.jpeg)
Help Kids Realize Their Potential With the Power of Less (With Kim John Payne)
When we're concerned about our kids' behavior, their stress and difficult moods, a lack of motivation, or an overall sense that we're not in harmony with them — the solution almost certainly comes down to "less." In this episode, Janet is joined by Kim John Payne, M.ED., renowned family consultant, lecturer, and author of the seminal parenting guide “Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids.” The book has been aptly described as “a manifesto for protecting the grace of childhood,” and there is much of Kim’s science-backed approach which supports and complements Janet’s. In their view, our fast-paced, competitive culture (“too much, too soon”) takes the joy out of parenting and can overwhelm our children, causing anxiety, insecurity, and many common behavioral problems. Kim and Janet discuss how the power of less can create the family life we always imagined and allow children to thrive. Kim John Payne's resources are at: SimplicityParenting.com/ Learn more about Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" at: NoBadKidsCourse.com. Please support our sponsors and take advantage of their special offers. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
42 mins
6 August Finished
![The Scoop on Independent Play (And Myths That Get in the Way)](https://img.resized.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-scoop-on-independent-play-and-myths-that-get-in-the-way.jpeg)
The Scoop on Independent Play (And Myths That Get in the Way)
Children are innately driven to play, and the benefits are enormous. They're also driven to seek our attention and connection, so how can we encourage our kids' play without becoming their constant playmate? In this episode Janet dispels seven common misunderstandings that make the lifelong habit (and gift) of self-directed play much more challenging to foster. She suggests helpful alternatives that not only encourage play, but also bolster self-esteem and strengthen parent-child bonds. Learn more about Janet's "No Bad Kids Master Course" at: NoBadKidsCourse.com. Please support our sponsors and take advantage of their special offers. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
25 mins
30 July Finished